pssst! scb! this cupcake reminds me of you! <3
WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW, GENDER ROLES?
ZE HATH FORSAKEN YOU!
So at grad photos, one of my good friends asked me to help them put on a wig, and brought me into the girl’s washroom to do it. There must have been at least six or seven girls already in there doing makeup, and more going in and out while I was there. Not a SINGLE complaint, everyone was super nice. I come out a few months later (IE last monday), and I go into the girl’s washroom to pee. One student. One complaint. Immediate call down to the office (using male name no less), and ban on using the girl’s washroom. I’m going to the district to fight it, but I honestly don’t see any hope.
holy shit. if i can do anything to help out, just lemme know. i will be right there with you fighting the district, if you want. no way are those fuckers getting away with that shit here.
Samuel’s already making ALL OF THE CALLS trying to fix it.
Personally I’m just going to print off an article about the bill to get gender identity in the charter of rights, throw a positit on there saying “tick tock”, and casually leave it on my principal’s desk. >:3
yay for samuel! he’s kinda a super hero. <3 also, you are casually awesome. and by “casually,” i mean you’re fucking awesome.
If a Trans* Person Asks You to Use Certain Pronouns
Do it. Just fucking do it. It doesn’t matter what we look like, what our mannerisms are like, whether we’re out or not in separare spheres of our life, how long you’ve known us, whether you still think of us as our assigned sex, anything. If you respect us as people, you will use the pronouns we ask you for. If you don’t, we will be forced to conclude that you don’t respect us.
A lot of cis people seem fond of saying that pronouns are “just words” and that if they mess them up repeatedly it shouldn’t be a big deal because they still respect us and it’s just “hard for them to remember.” No. That won’t fly. It may be just a little word to you, but here’s what it means to a trans* person when someone who claims to care for them repeatedly messes up their pronouns with no sign of improvement:
- You don’t care about me enough to ensure my happiness and mental well-being by doing this relatively minor thing I’ve asked for; how can I count on you to do major things, like defend me from an attacker or fight for my medical rights, when I need them?
- You still think of me as my assigned sex and don’t believe what I have to say about my own identity; you don’t respect my ability to self-determine.
- Your freedom to avoid things that inconvenience you is more important to you than my right to be respected and feel safe.
Basically, someone repeatedly messing up our pronouns for months at a time and consistently brushing it off as a “mistake” that we shouldn’t be angry about because it wasn’t an aggressive act of deliberate misgendering—that’s the biggest, clearest sign we’ve got that someone who claims to be in our camp is actually not trustworthy.
Let me repeat that: if you keep making this “little mistake” and brushing it off when we get upset, we will be forced to conclude that deep down, you don’t actually care about our happiness, mental well-being, safety, or self-determination.
It might just be a word to you. But for us, this is a word with some serious weight. And if you truly care about us, you have to take that weight into account and respect it. Because if you don’t, what you’re telling us is that you don’t respect us. It may not sound like that to you, but that’s the subtext we read from it. This is why pronouns matter: it’s not just the literal word, it’s everything that word carries with it.
Pronouns are important. Respect trans* people’s safety. Respect our pronouns.
if you use arbitrary grammar rules created by white men as a reason not to use my pronouns?
go fuck yourself.
[TW: rape, rape culture] What people don’t understand is when we say “Teach men not to rape,” we’re not talking about telling them not to jump out of the bushes in a ski mask and grab the nearest female. We’re talking about the way we teach boys that masculinity is measured by power over others, and that they aren’t men unless they “get some.” We’re talking about teaching men (and women) that it’s not okay to laugh at jokes about rape and abuse. We’re talking about telling men that a lack of “No” doesn’t mean “Yes,” that if a woman is too drunk to consent they shouldn’t touch her, that dating someone - or even being married to someone - does not mean automatic consent. We’re talking about teaching boys to pay attention to the girl they’re with, and if she looks uncomfortable to stop and ask if she’s okay, because sometimes girls don’t know how to say stop in a situation like that. We’re talking about how women have the right to change their mind. Even if she’s been saying yes all night, if she says no, that’s it. It’s over. That’s what we mean when we say “Teach men not to rape.